The Top 5 Questions Kids Ask About Bedwetting

When it comes to bedwetting, children can have many questions. Whether they verbalize them themselves or parents address them head-on, it's best to have answers ready. The five main questions—in no particular order, offered by Dr. Charles Sophy, medical director of the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services—are: 1. Why do I wet my bed? The National Kidney Foundation (NKF) says that children who wet the bed don't do it on purpose. It happens because children don't wake up when they need to go to the bathroom. It can also happen because the kidneys produce too much urine during sleep or the bladder is unable to contain it, or because of a hereditary link (i.e., bedwetting runs in families). Bedwetting can also be caused by another health problem. "Depending on the child's age and medical condition, there can be different reasons for bedwetting," says Dr. Sophy. A visit to the doctor will help rule out any hidden medical causes. When a patient asks him this question, Dr. Michael Wasserman, a pediatrician at the Ochsner Clinic Foundation in New Orleans, Louisiana, says that the bladder, where urine is stored, has a control system that doesn't always work very well, but that improves as the child matures. 2. How can I stop bedwetting? You and your child can work together to find the bedwetting management technique that works best for you and your family. Dr. Sr. Sophy suggests seeking help from a doctor. The NKF recommends a few techniques that your child can discuss with a parent or doctor: Drink regularly during the day Use the toilet at least 5 times a day Use a Pee Stop Alarm Avoid caffeinated drinks, sugar and fruit juices. A family member can wake the child at night to go to the bathroom if the child cannot go alone. Use a calendar to track nights with and without incidents. Ask the doctor what treatment might help. Wear disposable underwear for your comfort and to avoid wetting your sheets. Among children who wet the bed, 15% stop each year, regardless of the therapy they choose or not, says Dr. Wasserman. Time is on the child's side, which means the bedwetting will eventually go away. 3. Do my friends wet the bed at night too? Bedwetting is more common than people think! Tell your child that according to the NKF, there are more than five million children in the United States who continue to wet the bed after age 6, and most will outgrow the problem. So, chances are your child knows someone who wets the bed. 4. Is bedwetting normal? Dr. Wasserman says that, in general, the vast majority of bedwetting children are medically normal. In fact, the parents of many bedwetting children suffered from the same problem as children. "In some cases, bedwetting may be a predictable manifestation of a medical or psychological problem," says Dr. Sophy. A medical examination should be done to rule out any hidden medical conditions. 5. Is there something wrong with me? Dr. Wasserman says the question could also be: Am I different, or even abnormal? The child usually asks this question—and others do—because they feel different, in a negative sense. Children lose self-esteem, which is by far the most important aspect of the problem and the one parents should pay most attention to,” says Dr. Wasserman. “Parents need to prevent bedwetting from becoming a negative experience and focus on the child’s positive accomplishments. Using a reward/recognition system for uneventful nights is a good start. Verbal praise is effective, and in other forms, too, such as a calendar marked with a star for uneventful nights.” It's often fear, embarrassment, and confusion that drives your child's questions. But sometimes a child is too emotionally locked in to ask. Dr. Wasserman has found that it's harder for boys than girls to discuss "body function" issues. Interestingly, it's usually not the children who ask about bedwetting, but the parents. Children don't usually articulate their anxieties directly, even when I ask them, says Dr. Wasserman. All the more reason for parents to be prepared. "Parents had better take the initiative," says Dr. Sophy. "The older the child, the more embarrassment and self-esteem issues they'll experience," he says. "With younger children, confusion and anger at not being in control come to the forefront and are expressed. A frank discussion is always best." Let your child draw their feelings and write an accompanying text, and let them finish the book however they like. Bind the book using the stapler or three-hole punch and tying it with ribbon.