As a family: fighting bedwetting

Like her 6-year-old daughter, Marsha Lawrence* of North Carolina experienced the embarrassment of bedwetting as a child. Now she helps Katie*, her middle daughter, overcome the emotional issues surrounding her problem. "I had bad kidneys myself as a child," she says. "I understand what she's going through; I wet the bed until third grade." Katie has suffered from kidney problems since she was 7 weeks old when she suffered her first E. coli infection. At age 3, while dealing with kidney reflux, she began wetting the bed. You can count on me Sharing this shared experience with her daughter Katie, Marsha is able to offer her comfort and support. Marsha says her daughter often struggles with her bedwetting, but rather than getting angry with her, she takes a gentle, calm approach when comforting her. “I first remembered the doctor saying to take it one day at a time,” she says. “I found it difficult because I realized I was angry and upset when an incident occurred. That’s not the way to go. Don’t lose your temper. Remember, it’s not your fault, nor is it your child’s.” Marsha says the social stigma of bedwetting is what her daughter struggles with the most. She avoids sleepovers with her friends because she's afraid they'll find out about her bedwetting. This is a real problem because she wants to go to sleepovers at her friends' houses, but she's afraid someone will find out, Marsha says. She hides her problem, and it's very upsetting for her. We'll try anything To help her daughter cope with bedwetting, Marsha has spent the past three years researching the topic, seeing different doctors, and trying various treatments. Most doctors suggest that Katie's bedwetting will go away with age. "We've been through the wringer, and I've seen many doctors who have all told us the same thing: Children who have had kidney problems usually wet the bed," Martha says. "Most doctors tell us it's likely to last until Katie is 10 or 11, but during my research, I've read that for some children, it lasts into their teens. I hope that won't be the case for us." Unfortunately for Katie, traditional bedwetting treatments haven't worked. We've tried everything from avoiding caffeine and not drinking anything after 6 p.m. to cranberry supplements and waking her up in the middle of the night, Marsha says. We've put alarm clocks in her room, but she still wets the bed. We've even tried a psychological approach by asking her to strip the wet sheets herself and put them in the laundry. The bedwetting hasn't gone away—for her, it's a medical problem that no doctor can explain. Luckily there are disposable underwear and pads. Despite unsuccessful attempts to stop Katie's bedwetting, Marsha remains optimistic and believes her daughter's problem will lessen over time. She is grateful for disposable underwear, which saves her from having to replace expensive mattresses and change sheets every night. "We've already replaced an entire bed, so at least the disposable underwear helps Katie stay dry," she says. "They save the bed and ease my daughter's emotional distress. Disposable underwear or pads are a blessing to us." * While bedwetting is a normal part of growing up, we have chosen to change the names of individuals in our articles to protect their privacy. Keep in mind that according to the National Kidney Foundation, more than five to seven million children over the age of 5 wet the bed in the United States.