Do you remember your childhood games?
Sometimes you'd miss your shot, say you weren't ready, and ask to try again. As a parent, I've often wished I could turn back time. Parenting can be tough! There are no classes on how to stay calm when your teenager is learning to drive and nearly rips the mailbox off the wall. There's no guide on how to react when your toddler writes "I love Mommy" on the wall with a permanent marker. And the best way to deal with bedwetting is probably not the first thing that comes to mind when you see the pink line on the pregnancy test.
Six pink lines later, I had my fair share of bedwetting. Over the years, I learned the best (and worst) ways to handle these nighttime accidents. I'm sharing these tips in the hopes that you'll feel better equipped to tackle this tricky issue. Let me first share my mistakes. I remember getting angry at my oldest for wetting the bed, thinking he was doing it on purpose. Or not necessarily on purpose, but I genuinely believed it was just laziness and that he could stop if he wanted to. But, of course, I was wrong. I stayed angry with him for several years, and he felt ashamed. Bedwetting caused us both enormous frustration, and we really struggled to talk about it. Luckily, I had plenty of opportunities to correct my mistakes with my other five children.
Here's what I've learned:
- Tell your child they're not doing anything wrong: the most important thing to know about bedwetting is that it's not your child's fault, and they need to know you're not disappointed in them. Bedwetting is almost always due to physiological causes, such as an immature bladder or deep sleep. For many children, the body takes a little longer to mature.
- Gently tell your child that it's simply a growing pain: be patient and know that it will pass. Bedwetting is a temporary condition that your child will overcome in time when their body is ready. 99% of all children outgrow bedwetting before the age of 15 (and most well before that).
- Tell your child it's not a big deal: the more upset you are, the more upset your child will be when they wet the bed. Stay calm and try different solutions. Offer your child disposable absorbent underwear at bedtime, or wake them up before you go to bed so they can go to the bathroom. Use a calendar to track the number of dry nights versus wet nights, and use this to draw their attention to the number of dry nights.
The most important thing you can do as a parent is to make sure your children know you love them and that you'll work together to resolve these nighttime accidents. In the parenting game, there aren't many second chances. Being as informed as possible helps your child stay strong and happy when going through these challenging situations.
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