Too old to wet the bed?

Bedwetting can be embarrassing at any age.

• But what about a young adult who is trying to hide their problem from their friends?
• Teenagers who wet the bed, suffering from a problem known as nocturnal enuresis, may find it even more embarrassing than younger children. After all, children should stop wetting the bed before adolescence, right? Not necessarily.

For parents:

What can I do for my teenager?

Chances are, a teenager with bedwetting won't suffer from it forever. Most teenagers outgrow it naturally, and only a very small percentage experience it later in life, says Molly Haig of the Enuresis Resource and Information Centre (ERIC). Until then, your child's self-esteem is at stake; the longer they experience the embarrassment of wetting the bed, the more their self-worth is likely to suffer. So, contact a doctor as soon as your teen mentions the problem. You can then take charge as a team, suggests Denise Witmer, a parenting expert at About.com. Be supportive. Don't make a big deal out of wetting the bed, says Witmer. Show your child how to remove the sheets and do laundry. Witmer also advises parents to keep the issue private. Sharing it with other family members or friends will only embarrass your teen, she says.

For teenagers:

How can I get help?

If you're a teenager and you wet the bed, make sure you talk to someone first. It can be difficult, but you're not alone in experiencing bedwetting. In fact, according to the National Kidney Foundation, 1 to 2 out of every 100 teenagers wet the bed by the age of 15.

• First, ask your parents for help; the parents of many bedwetting children suffered from the same problem when they were children, so your mother or father may have experienced it as well. Even if they have never experienced bedwetting, your parents or another trusted adult will be more likely to help you overcome this problem than to embarrass you.
• Keeping this to yourself prevents you from being examined by a doctor if needed (sometimes a simple urinary tract infection is the cause). Furthermore, even if the doctor doesn't find a physical cause for your condition, they can give you advice on managing your bedwetting.

And what about social situations?

Teenagers who wet the bed have other worries besides which classmates will be at the football game. They may be thinking too much about hiding their bedwetting problem to enjoy social situations. While there are ways to keep bedwetting a secret, counselors at ERIC suggest that sometimes it's best to confide in a few close friends and talk to them about your problem. Once it's out in the open, there's no longer any worry about spending the night somewhere else, for example. If you feel comfortable enough to confide in them, tell your friends that you have a health issue and that you're following a plan designed to correct the problem with the support of your doctor. You can share the statistics with them, as they may not know how common bedwetting is in children. When you feel comfortable enough to talk about your bedwetting, you won't have to feel isolated from your friends anymore.

If you don't feel comfortable sharing your "secret" with your friends, or if you're worried they might be embarrassed by your problem, talk to your doctor and parents about strategies for avoiding bedwetting at night. Try to avoid caffeinated drinks before bed, and remember to urinate several times before going to sleep. Another option that can save you the embarrassment of wet sheets is to use disposable bed pads. You can put them on when you get into your pajamas, and no one will know.

How can I find support?

Use the internet to find local or online support groups where you can exchange ideas with others experiencing the same problem. Visit the website which offers information and discussion forums for parents and children. Getting advice from real families dealing with bedwetting can help your own family through this time.

If you don't succeed the first time...

Sit down with your parents and doctor to develop a plan. Don't give up. Chances are good that you'll join the thousands of teenagers who have overcome bedwetting.